Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
