I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
