Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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