I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
