Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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