tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
