somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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