Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
It's rum buckets o'clock
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
