quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Damn victory sex feels great
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
