Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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