Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I intend to get homeless drunk
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
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