I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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