So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
