Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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