alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Randomize
