A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
