i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
