Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
