That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
