remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
