how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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