Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize