He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
