singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Randomize
