i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
