Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
