So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
