Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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