i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
