He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
