whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Randomize
