I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
