She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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