margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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