can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
we're so committed to being not committed
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
