she's into porn, im staying here tonight
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
