This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Randomize
