Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
