dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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