if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
