This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
