when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
