my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Randomize