after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I FOUND THE LEGS
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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