I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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