My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
