I think my vagina is haunted
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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