Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
