I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Never underestimate the power of titties
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
