Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
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