I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
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